Until you know better...

I didn't start this journey on day one eating, feeling, or looking how I do now. I do the best I can each day and while it looks different now, I am proud of all I did to get here. 3 years ago lite cool whip, to me, was healthier than ice cream. And that is OKAY! The lite cool whip got me to eat fresh berries as desserts. That was progress. Be proud of your progress!!

Don't get caught up in the hype of perfect clean eating. Don't get caught up in the hype of the perfect picture. Just be your best self, each day. I know I am busy Becoming Annie and I hope you're busy Becoming YOU!!!

Reinspired!

I had all these grand plans of blogging the last few months but my work and daydreams got in the way! Work is going well. My daydreams, that's another thing.

Moving forward it is my goal to help others, especially with PCOS, do what I have done - to create a heathy life and a happy life. It's the strangest feeling in the world when your daydreams don't come true when you want them to, and it turns out to be the best thing that's ever happened.

Looking forward to 2015!!!

my sleepy little blog...

It's been a long and emotional summer. School has just started. My weight is a few pounds higher than I would like it to be. But I've been known to say I would rather be busy than bored. I've been busy enjoying family vacations, rehabbing my shoulder, and doing a little spot in Fitness Magazine {more on that soon, I promise}!

Part of the sleepiness of my blog is I am not sure where to take it. I'm pretty much done losing weight, with the exception of this 10-ish pounds I've put back on since surgery #2 {more on that later too, though that one will be a hard post to write}. But I am doing a round of 28 to Great starting next week so that should take care of it. We also aren't trying to have kids anytime soon, though we have given it some thought. But, let's face it, trying to have kids isn't that much fun (or at least it wasn't last time). I've thought about focusing more on tips I have learned along the way, recipes I like, and what I do for exercise.

I want to continue to inspire others and use my story to change, not only my life, but the lives of others around me. If you have any topics you'd like me to talk about just let me know. I am an open book and am happy to share any part of my story! Fertility, weight loss, PCOS, barre3, food, mindset & more!

Fingers crossed {that I am inspiring people}...

getting there!

I have waited 5 1/2 months to hear my surgeon say the words "you can touch the barre again." And on Monday, I heard them!! That was at 5:00 PM and by 5:30 I was at barre3 :) Would you expect anything less?!?!

I've seen my surgeon over 10 times in the past 2 years and there's only been 3 appointments I haven't cried during - that's what happens when you see your surgeon while you're in pain! He's a wonderful man but it is SO great to see him smile.

He was SUPER impressed with my scapular control and not using my traps anymore! He was also impressed how long I could maintain a hold, my range of motion, and how happy it's all going. Basically, there was nothing he wasn't pleased with.

I came with a list of things I want to do but mentally need his permission for.

Barre3 using the barre - YES!!
Hiking - Kind of. Little hikes, backpack under 15 pounds. 
Mt St Helens - No :( 
Tennis - Volleying & forehands only. So really, no. 
Horse back riding - No
Golf - Putting & chipping from the sand/long grass only
Biking - Yes on flat land & yes to spin classes

I'm okay with almost all of these. I am very disappointed that I cannot do Mt St Helens this summer BUT I know it's for the better. I'd have to carry a LOT more weight than 15 pounds and pull myself up over boulders and use hiking poles. All no-nos. It's just not worth the risk!

I see him again in 6 weeks and IF things are going good then I'll be fully released with a 1 month check in after that. SO...if all goes well, by the end of August I could be considered "graduated" from all of this which is thrilling and terrifying all at once.

It's been a long road to get here but I am so thankful for my WHOLE village for all of their support during this time. It's a relief to be released of some of my restrictions, to be looking at the "end", and to be moving forward!!

Fingers crossed ~ that this is the beginning of good arms ;-)

b3 challenge - starting week 2

Today was day one of week two of the barre3 spring challenge! So far my favorite part has been connecting with people on Instagram, my jeans fitting better, and proving to myself that I can do this!

week one - done!

Week one went really well. I got all my classes & 10 minutes in, made great connections, lost 1 pound and had NO treats from the staff room. Which, during teacher appreciation week, is saying a LOT about my level of self control. I might have had a few too many barre3 treats but I figure those are better than the processed stuff any day!

I know from past experiences that this week will be hard! It's the week when I'll want the treats I didn't allow myself to have last week. It will be the week that my mind wants the things my body used to crave. Thankfully, I've already scheduled my classes for the week, my snacks are prepped, and I have the whole barre3 community watching me! Peer pressure is a wonderful thing sometimes.

Here's some pictures of week one!!!

hers & his smoothies

I always pack my bag the night before! One less thing in the AM!

I think I am the only one at barre3 Vancouver bringing my orange ball!

Had an awesome HH Friday class at barre3 Williams!

Whitney, Me, Sarah, Maggie

My goal this week is to make myself proud. 

Fingers crossed {that week 2 is just as good as week 1}...

I talk to myself...do you?

I know...it sounds weird but it is so, so true! I spend a vast majority of the day talking to myself. Not just thinking, but actually talking out loud! 

I do it because I need to. For so long I was such a negative person - talking down to myself, talking about others in negative ways, judging people I'd never met, and just basically being miserable! It wasn't a good existence. Over the last two years, as I have lost the weight, gained a love for barre3, and had to focus on myself more than ever before, I feel like I have truly changed but it hasn't been without a lot of work!

Throughout the last few years I have spent a lot of time talking to myself. It used to be all negative and sometimes still occasionally is, lets be real...we are our toughest critics. That's why this post is happening. The last two months after my second shoulder surgery have been rough. With no exact date to my barre3 ban known, a basic lack of motivation and without my friends being off of work at the same time of me - leading to boredom I'm definitely feeling deflated. Then the other day I YELLED at myself - SNAP OUT OF IT! Things aren't as bad as you think!!! And that was when I realized how negative I was being. Here's a few of the examples of how I talk to myself...

~ You just had surgery so your arms are supposed to look like that.
~ If you eat cheese, you will get zits. Don't eat the cheese.
~ You can go to the gym for an hour. If you were at your best you'd be going to barre3 for an hour. That's the same amount of time, just a different activity.
~ You don't need Burgerville. Especially when you are by yourself in the car. If you're going to eat fast food - always eat it with others to be accountable.
~ Stop avoiding something you should really be doing! {I was funneling cheese into a smaller container when I was supposed to be writing a letter of rec}
~ You've already walked for 30 minutes, turn on another Sex & The City episode and continue walking!
~ Don't text while driving. You don't want to get hurt or hurt anyone else
~ Sit up straighter.

These are just a few examples from the past few days!

Do you talk to yourself either out loud or in your head? I think we all have some sort of self talking go on - especially when it comes to foods!

Fingers crossed {that my self talk becomes more and more positive}!!!

2 year endocrinologist update!

Last week I went to my endocrinologist for my 2 year check up! I was seriously excited to go because I was proud to show off all the changes I had made.

I am in no way-shape-or form a doctor. This post is based solely on what my Endocrinologist and myself discussed. If you have health related questions please contact your own doctor. 

 

I am so proud of the woman I was...she started this journey.

I am so proud of the woman I am now...because I have been changing my life for over 2 years.

I am sure I will be proud of the woman I will become...because, well, I can't imagine my life any other way!

**January 2012 - Initial Endocrinologist Results**
Weight ~ 213 lbs
BMI ~ 38%
Hemoglobin A1c ~ 5.9 {normal range according to my Endo is 4.0 - 6.0}

**January 2012 - 2 year Endocrinologist Results**
Weight: 143 lbs
BMI: 24%
Hemoglobin A1c ~ 4.6 after 22 months on Metformin

July 2011

October 2012

July 2011

November 2012

 

When I first got my results back from the endocrinologist I was considered insulin resistant, they thought I had something wrong with my adrenal glands {turns out I'd just recently had a cortisone shot and sent my levels through the roof}, my Vitamin D level was 17.6 L2 {normal range 30.0-150.0}, and I was just in overall poor health.

 

My first tipping point was a Halloween party...but my boulder that catapulted me off the seesaw was getting my lab results back! It really shocked my system. I KNEW I was overweight, I KNEW I was unhealthy & unhappy but until those numbers were on the paper I didn't realize how bad it was. Nothing to me, at that point, was as scary as hearing that if I kept on the path I was I would have diabetes in a year. My endocrinologist was very blunt with me and for that I will be forever grateful. She was the FIRST doctor to tell me I was overweight and needed to change. Looking back that fact still shocks me.

 

Over the course of the last 22 months I did go on a few different medications that I believed help me. I started 500mg extended release Metformin in February/March 2012 and stopped one week ago. I have a follow up appointment in July 2014 to see how 6 months off of Metformin goes and I am so excited to see if the hard work I put in pays off. I admit it, I am nervous to go off the Metformin because I feel like it did help me get to me a little "looser" with my carbs because of my PCOS. But I am ready for the challenge of eating what I know my pancreas can handle. My goal is to only eat carbs at 2/3 meals in my day.

 

I am still taking Vitamin D {I mean, I like in Washington State so I feel like I'd need that anyways}, Singular, and birth control. Totally normal and totally unrelated to PCOS meds!

 

Fingers crossed {that my levels stay low}!!!

a day in the life...

...of ME!

The day after the workout video I was in came out, a blog expose about me was published on the barre3 blog! Super humbling and super exciting!!

I was approached by Kait to help write the blog post and inspire people to live the barre3 life throughout their days. Everything I said on here, I truly do!!

6am: Wake Up

6:10am: Start a 10 minute workout. My go-to this early is Standing Energy Blast: Legs, Glutes, + Core because it doesn’t require anything besides my dresser and my glasses!

7-7:15am: Quick Breakfast. My favorite quick breakfast is the “Glass Half Full” Detox Smoothie, especially because I can prep it the night before.

8:00am: Arrive at school to teach my students—I’m a special education teacher at an elementary school.

12:00-1pm: Lunch! I always have leftovers & a salad. To save time, I prep my salads four at a time on Sundays so that they’re ready to go each morning. I also squeeze in some quick exercise on my lunch break. During the winter I do a workout on the barre3 App. In the spring and fall I walk a lap outside on the track.

3:30pm: Say goodbye to the kids and head to barre3 Vancouver for class.

4:15 – 5:15pm: This is my favorite time to take class. It’s always packed which gives me so much energy, but it lets me get home in enough time to cook and have dinner with my husband.

5:15-5:30pm: After class, I connect with the instructor and other clients. The face time I get in studio after class helps me stay on track and motivated. I also use this time to plug into Facebook and Instagram to share my workout and see how my other friends’ workouts went that day. I’m a member of a few closed fitness focused Facebook groups, and I love supporting others to help them reach their fitness goals.

5:45-7pm: Prepare dinner. If my husband is home from work, he helps me cook too. Our favorite go-to during the week is the DIY Salad or DIY Bowl because they’re so easy. We always make big batches of the meat and chopped veggies for leftovers during the week.

7:00-7:30pm: Dinner time. I love this part of the day because it gives us a chance to sit down and connect over a healthy, balanced meal.

8:00-8:45pm: Epsom salt baths are another highlight of my day. I take one each evening as part of my bedtime ritual. Baths help me to relax and calm down before bed.

8:45-10pm: Reading in bed, then sleep!

What really got me was the part of the blog post I was not involved in...

For a definition of “glow,” you could check out the dictionary, or better yet, check out Annie Eeds. Not only does she glow from the inside out, she inspires us all to embrace whole-body health through her own dramatic transformation.

 

Even though she’s lost 80 pounds since she started as a client at barre3, she isn’t fixated on a number on the scale. Instead, Annie coined the term “off-the-scale victories” to describe the successes that are most important to her. (It’s a term we’ve since adopted and embraced.) Some of Annie’s biggest victories include no longer being at risk for diabetes, having energy to climb the stairs, the ability to balance in Warrior III better than she ever thought possible, and inspiring her husband to take better care of himself.

 

Annie is so successful because she understands that being healthy isn’t just about the time she spends working out in studio and online. She focuses on self care all day long, and she inspires my team and I to do the same through her commitment and positive energy. She was kind enough to share her daily routine with us; read on to peek inside a day in the life of Annie Eeds.

 

****************************************************

 

I was SO honored to be featured on barre3.com blog. I love sharing my story and reaching others. While I wish I'd said something on here about PCOS but there is a "special project" coming up soon that I'll be featured in and they said that my PCOS would be mentioned! That's been such a HUGE part of my journey.

 

I truly do love my Non Scale Victories. I'm not sure where I first heard that term...I believe it was on Instagram. It means taking time to focus on the positive things you're doing and not just the number on the scale. Sure, the number on the scale gives you information but it can fluctuate SO much!

My very favorite NSV is back in September 2012 when I first realized I was beautiful...when looking in a barre3 mirror.

Fingers crossed {that you can fit some barre3 in to your day today}!!!

the day that I fell in love in barre3...

...well, maybe it wasn't that easy.

2 years ago I walked into barre3 Vancouver for the first time. In my memory it was "love at first sight" but my husband has other views. His views are probably more accurate. He says that I did enjoy it but I was sore for DAYS, worried about how much it costs, and just wasn't ready. I know all of that but boy, am I glad that those thoughts didn't stick.

 

It took me just about 4 months to go back to barre3. In between when I first went and April 2012 I had lost about 20 pounds, worked out with my trainer a lot, and was in a better place mentally. There was some "community free" classes which means they were free, so that was an added bonus. From then on...I was hooked!!!

Today, I am not going to barre3. I am at home resting and prepping for shoulder surgery 2.0 which is in 2 days. I went yesterday and will go tomorrow and both of those classes will be taught my owner {and one of my very favorite instructors} Carrie!

Tomorrow will be my 180th class. It will be about 14 hours before my second shoulder surgery and 208 days since my last one. It will be almost 800 days since my tipping point and will mark another 6 week set that I won't be able to go to a studio class.

Tomorrow will be emotional for many reasons but mostly because I am proud of what I have accomplished.

Fingers crossed {that my love for barre3 never dies}!!!

the 2 year mark!!!

Today marks 2 years since my tipping point. And you know how I celebrated...

Kait, Mom, Noel, Bree, Sara, Brooke, Jason

Erica, Me, Sabrina, Alison

{missing from the picture is Brian, Alison's husband}

 

BARRE3, of course!!!

 

I had invited my friends & family to join be at the barre for a class!! I was so happy with the turn out. A few of my village battled Portland rush hour traffic to be there with me. Erica taught a ROCKING class, it was so faced paced I didn't have time to cry. Except for at the end...the tears definitely came! Erica played "Girl on Fire" and dedicated it to me and then I looked around and saw my husband, Mom, and some of the very best friends a girl could ask for.

 

Flowers and cards from three of my biggest cheerleaders.

 

Carrie - owner of barre3 who accepted me for who I was and treats me like one of her own!

Amanda - my personal trainer who believed in me LONG before I believed in myself.

Kait & the barre3 Home Office - who continue to support & surprise me with their generosity.

Cards from Carrie & Amanda

The words on the outside are powerful. The words on the inside made my cry.

 

Afterwards Jason, Bree, Noel and I went to grab dinner since it was 7:30 and we were starving. We headed to the Mexican restaurant that shares a parking lot with barre3. It'd been a very long time since I'd been to a Mexican restaurant. Part of me really, REALLY wanted to get a cheese quesadilla but my friends reminded me I didn't need that. Instead I got a taco salad and it was very good!

 

Me, Noel & Bree

These two have stood by me and lifted me up through some of the roughest patches of my life.

 

Jason & I

I just love him SSSOOO much!!!

 

I have many feelings about this milestone and the future...

 

 

It is going to be interesting to see how this "maintenance" part of my change goes. I've been the same weight for about 12 weeks now so I really do consider myself in maintenance. Sure, I want to get tighter and more toned but I don't think my number on the scale is going to move easily anymore - and that's okay! I know I will never go back to where I was!! More on how I plan to tackle the maintenance part of my journey, later!

 

Fingers crossed {that maintenance is as easy as losing weight was}!!!

{30 thoughts} when will the celebrating stop?

Or should the celebrating stop?

As my two year tipping point anniversary approaches next week I've been thinking about this a lot. I like rewards, attention, and all these changes I've made!

I like to celebrate pounds lost, time spent, and results gained. I don't really know how many more "weight" celebrations I will get. I hope to someday get to -80 pounds but I don't know. The lowest I've gotten is to -79 pounds so it seems reachable! But after that I don't think my body is meant to lose too much more! I suppose I will continue to lose inches, too.

It seems like from here on out the milestones will be able time passing, joints working correctly, and finding new ways to get involved in what I truly love. It will be about lab results, tipping point & barre3 anniversaries, and new endeavors. And that's okay. It is time to focus on maintaining this lifestyle, inspiring others, and likely something that I don't know is a possibility!

Fingers crossed {there is a lot more to celebrate in the future}!!!

{30 thoughts} things people say...

People say some ODD things. I know I am guilty of this too but long ago I wanted to jot some of these down. There are things people have seriously said to me.

{When we were trying to get pregnant}

My husband could just look at my and I could get pregnant.

I wish I'd have had trouble getting pregnant then I wouldn't have had three little kids at the same time.

Just relax.

It'll happen if you really want it.

I could see you guys not ever having kids.

{When I was losing weight}

 

It's just a diet. You'll be off of it by next month.

 

Don't get too skinny like ______. She doesn't look healthy now.

 

What diet pill are you taking?

 

Do you think you're really going to be able to do this?

 

Why are you doing this to yourself?

 

Some of these questions are valid, some are insane, and some are down right insulting! I good portion of these are from 2 people. But you know what...the best part of all of it - it doesn't matter! I mean, it bugs me but it doesn't affect what I am doing. I am letting all the positive praise, comments, and inquiries fill me up with joy!!!

Rise above the negative.

Fingers crossed {that I haven't accidentally said something like this to someone}!

{30 thoughts} what I have gained while losing

I always say I've lost 79 pounds but truly, that is the only thing I have truly lost on this journey.

Here's a small list of what I feel I've gained...

~ The ability to know I can try anything
~ A love for myself
~ The knowledge of what to put in my body
~ A new lease on life
~ Hopefully the ability to get pregnant
~ New friends {barre3, PCOS groups}
~ Happiness
~ A calmer mind
~ A new body
~ My life
~ A desire to help others find their own journey

Fingers crossed {that I gain many more opportunities}...

{30 thoughts} full of frustration

A few weeks ago I tweaked my shoulder at work. I can't go into any more detail than that but let's just say I am not happy about it. For a week I kind of ignored it and thought it would get better. Yes, I did go see my PT but I didn't go see my surgeon. I already had my 4 month appointment with him so I figured I'd just wait until then. That appointment happened 13 days after the injury.

not happy tears at my 4 month check up

My surgeon is pretty certain I didn't injure what I just had surgery on {labrum} but there is some question as to if I injured something else. Only time will tell. I now am back to two times per week PT and we are giving it a month and if it isn't getting we are going back in for an MRI. I doubt I will make it to a month without the MRI...but we will see. I NEED to know. Even if it feels kind of better in the next month I want an MRI.

At this moment in time frustration does not begin to cover my thought process. I do not know what I will do if I have to have another shoulder surgery. The first time I was rather blissful before the recovery but now I know exactly what it entails. OKAY...I cannot think that this. I must hope and envision and dream of a healed shoulder. I must do my exercises. I slacked off when I got hurt because I was just in a terrible mood. I must go to barre3 {with major modifications} because it is the best thing for my soul. Though, it is SO frustrating that before the incident I was doing full barre3 with absolutely no modifications. SIGH.

Regardless of what happens life will go on. Barre3 will be there, my husband will be supportive, and I will get through this obstacle.

Fingers crossed {that I do NOT need another surgery}!!!

{30 thoughts} change is hard...

...on relationships & my thought process {and more, but that's for another post}. This journey hasn't been all about weight loss. I'm truly changing every aspect of my life.

I have been mulling over how to write this post for a week. The best way...be honest. Here goes nothing {and a lot of self-reflection}.

My relationships (both family & friends) have been lop-sided in the past. I know I take a lot of energy to be with and I'm truly trying to change that. Trying to listen more and talk less {my Mom just laughed out loud}, trying to call "just because" instead of tell a certain story, to ask what others want to do instead of just suggesting what I want to do. Problem is, change is hard. I LOVE to plan, I LOVE attention, and I LOVE my family & my friends. There's the honest truth.

I had a very {very} good friend tell me the other day that she knows I am changing because she can see I am trying very hard not to talk about others behind their backs. My husband {whom I love with my whole heart} told me that he likes to be around me now more than he did in the past because I am the happiest I've been since we've been together. I'm scared to know what my Mom would say but I bet it would be good {she is my most honest critic}. The fact that my friends & family can tell me these things means the world to me. Last year I would not have reacted with a "thank you" - I would have been pissed.

My thought process is changing. Here's a weird example: someone speeds up and cuts me off. My old reaction {and my husband's current reaction} is to get pissed, honk, flip the bird, speed up, and/or etc. For the most part I now try to think something along the lines of "I hope they aren't in a hurry to get to a bad situation" or "I'm going to back off so I don't get into a wreck with them if they lose control". You know what else is changing...what I want to spend my time doing. I used to go out to HH {happy hour, for those of you not in the know} multiple times a week. Now I want to go to barre3 or on a walk most days. Sure, I wouldn't mind a HH after barre3 once in a while but lots of my friends want to go right after work which is prime barre3 time! I've found through trial & error that working out after HH isn't always the best idea. I want to spend my time with people who enrich my life and who like to be active. Don't get me wrong...I'm all for a good HH sometimes {like tonight with my new staff} but multiple times every week. It just isn't me anymore.

Fingers crossed {that these changes continue to be positive}...

{30 thoughts} ask for what you want...

Eating outside of my house is a weekly struggle. Between dinners with the hubby {which are a tad easier because I can always control the destination} and happy hours, I'd say I eat out two days a week. Often when it is during the week and Jason is involved I will head to Pita Pit or somewhere where I can get a quick salad! Happy hour and regular restaurants are a different story.

As with many things in life, when I am by the "best of something" I will have it. My favorite fries are at The Island Café which happens to not be open year round, which is convenient. I have yet to decide where my favorite mac & cheese is. My favorite quesadilla is at Chevys.

The rest of the time, I stick to salads. With major modifications. I've been called picky, spoiled, difficult - all by waiters. And you know what...I am damn proud of that. If I don't want to eat cheese, I ask for no cheese. If I want a different kind of chicken, I ask for it. The key is...it is MY responsibility to ask for it. People are not mind readers. It truly is that simple. If you don't want it...DON'T ORDER IT!!! It is the waiters job to get you want you want not to know what you should be eating.

One way I have tried to turn "eating out" into "eating in" is by having friends over or going to their house! It does take more planning, it can sometimes cost more money, but I know that I won't bring things I don't want to eat as much of to someone else's house (or my own).

Bree & I eating at her apartment in Portland.

She made the soup and I brought the salad!

I have friends who really like to go to Mexican restaurants but chips are my weakness {and my husband's kryptonite}. No matter if we ask for chips or not - we get them! I get it, that's why most people go to a Mexican restaurant but sometimes my willpower just cannot handle it! Oh, and lets not talk about the cheese that is in everything!! YUMMMMMM.

The moral of this post is...ask for what you want. If you want to eat in, tell your friends & family. If you want to eat out, see if you can choose the restaurant.

If not. Try to make good choices and if you don't, try next time. Life goes on regardless of what you eat!

Fingers crossed {I don't go to "eating crazy" when I go to Pullman in 1.5 weeks}...

being attached to an outcome...

attached ~ joined or fastened to something
outcome ~ something that follows as a result or consequence

This past week has really been a testament to not being attached to a perceived outcome. When I start something I expect things to go as I want them to (unrealistic - I know). I'm historically known for not doing well when things don't go my way or how I expect them to go. I've been trying to work on this and I think that maybe, just maybe, this is the week that will change it all. Or at least, I can consider it a good attitude week.

barre3 and QVC

expected outcome: to be with Harper working out in the background as Sadie sells barre3 DVD's.
actual outcome: spending less than 36 hours in Philadelphia visiting a new barre3 studio, getting to know Harper, Sadie, and Chris as I wouldn't have otherwise, and getting to go back!

Without these change in plans I wouldn't have spent all that time in the car with Sadie & Chris while they were relaxed. I might not got to have heard various conversations about the business of barre3. I wouldn't have had the chance to meet and chat with the studio owner & a few instructors of barre3 Newtown. Harper and I wouldn't have ventured into Philly. It was impossible to be mad at the situation when the people who were paying for, living for, and had dreamed of it for longer than me, were so super positive.

the number on the scale ~ goal weight

expected outcome: a number in a range based on height (that NO doctor ever talked to me about)

actual outcome: currently 144.4

 

The number on the scale is a tough thing to get over. Society has taught us that it means so much but I believe it truly doesn't. When I started this journey almost 22 months ago I honestly didn't have a goal weight in mind. I still don't! I didn't think I could lose this much weight. Sure, I wanted to but I didn't know how. My one goal....to NOT be diabetes! That's a good goal...right?!?! I truly believe that this is why I have had the success that I have had. I wasn't hyper focused on one number, I was hyper focused on health. Plain and simple.

 

I obviously used the scale as a tool but I think I'm done with it for a while. I have a Cyster name Chelsea who is rocking her PCOS body & weight loss and she just did "no scale July" and I'm thinking I need to do "no scale August". It will be a nice break from the "Wednesday weekly weight in".  It's going to be super hard but I need to trust in the process. I have learned SO much about my body in the past almost 2 years. I now know what to feed it to fuel it and I know how to work it to support it.  

 

***********************************

 

Sometimes the actual outcome is better than the expected outcome. It's all about figuring out what you want to do, whether it be lose weight, change something about yourself, or make a change in your life. Once you figure out what you want to do it's all about figuring out how to do! It's all common sense! For me...slow and steady was the way to go. I bought books on PCOS, I talked to people about food & exercise, I tried barre3 {which changed my life forever}, and I got uncomfortable. Looking back, I was uncomfortable before I lost the weight.

 

***********************************

 

And because I L.O.V.E. comparison pictures...

 

 

Left ~ July 29th, 2011. One day before Leena's wedding.

Right ~ July 30th, 2013. Just another normal day of barre3, PT, and a walk with Sabrina.

 

Leena's cousins said it best...

 

The woman in the before picture is pretty amazing. After all, it was her that had the discipline and determination to set and achieve a goal. ~Ajay

Fingers crossed {that more unexpectedly amazing outcomes are coming my way}...

 



healing & next steps...

These last 5 1/2 weeks have been a gigantic lesson on healing. I had major surgery and my body needs time to heal but my brain isn't doing so good with that. I haven't gained a single pound which is a victory in and of itself... But I have definitely gained back inches! I won't deny that I am very frustrated by that.

Before the surgery I told myself I was going to do Barre3 online every day, go on walks, and stay active. And I did that, some days. The majority of the days I did not. I feel like I have reverted back to the "pre weight loss Annie" way of life... Sitting on the couch, eating things I shouldn't, being bored. I know this is because my body has to heal but I'm just struggling with it.




Here's what I know...
I get my sling off tomorrow and so I truly know that that will be the day that starts to change everything. I know I will be able to walk outside now because the sling won't make me too hot. I know I will have exercises to do every day to strengthen my shoulder. I know I can choose what I eat. I have to be on live television in nine days. I miss Barre3 studio classes.

Here's what I want...
To lose this extra inch-ish that I gained around my hips. To get back into some kind of routine that doesn't involve sitting all day. To go to Barre3 studio classes more.

Here's how I'm going to do it...
Start planning meals again. Try going to Barre3 once or twice a week, the studio really is what I need. Plan ahead for snacks while I am out and about.

There's been a few days here or there over the last 20 months where I've not done as good as I wish I would have. But this "re-start" is very daunting. These old feelings crept back into my head... My old habits have surfaced because of my forced downtime... It's not that it's all been that bad, I just haven't been as cognizant of what I am putting in my body and the movement I've been giving it. Tomorrow that changes.




My goal is to re-incorporated small daily changes into my life. I've already had some pretty staggering long-term results... But I am hungry for more.

I've been inspired by so many people in these last few weeks with a project I'm doing with Barre3, women in my power up for PCOS group, and lots of women on Instagram!!

Here's to the next path on my journey. One of continuing what I already know, changing what I am doing to adapt to my body needs, and learning new things along the way!

Fingers crossed {for quick healing}...

100 and my first giveaway!

No...I have not lost 100 pounds (but i have lost 75 but that's another post). There are other exciting things that have to do with the number 100 that we need to talk about!!

This little post right here, this is my 100th post on this blog! What started out documenting my PCOS journey to inform my family and friends so I didn't have to repeat the story over and over again has morphed into a blog about how I have changed my life!

Just before my shoulder surgery I hit another 100 milestone...my 100th barre3 class!!! It just so happened to coincide with two of my good friends from high school trip down to Vancouver! My best friend Bree and my mom ended up surprising me and coming to the class also. It was a very wonderful morning.

L to R: Kalli, Melanie, mom, Bree, me! I just realized that these ladies composed 50% of my bridesmaids!

Bree and her niece Maya made me this awesome banner! It says "100 BARRE 3's CONGRATS ANNIE". I was very overwhelmed by her thoughtfulness. It is always fun to introduce new people to Barre3. Kalli and Melanie were friends number 34 & 35 of people who I have brought to a barre3 class! Someday soon I'll get to 40 (in only two more people, as of today, for the record).

This is me in front of the 'flagship' Barre3 in the Pearl District in Portland, Oregon. Those nifty purple pants I'm rocking are my 70 pound weight loss reward!! One of my good friends Kim gave me a gift certificate to Athleta for my birthday and told me to wait until I hit a big milestone to spend it. I'm pretty much in love with my purple pants.

As you may have guessed I'm also very much in love with Barre3 and since it is my 100th post I wanted to do a little Barre3 giveaway*!!

Annie's barre3 giveaway*...
- One month online workout subscription
- One barre workout ball (I will mail it to you)
- The possibility of becoming addicted to barre3 :-)

Rules...
- Anyone can enter. If you are from outside the US and it's too spendy to ship the barre ball to, you'll have to get your own! They're $9 on amazon.
- If you live in the Portland area and would rather have a gift certificate for one studio class (instead of the one month online subscription) we can arrange that!
- The giveaway will be closed at the end of the day on Sunday, June 30th, 2013. The drawing will be random!
- How to win - leave a comment in this post telling me your name and favorite body part of yours! I'm hoping this is enough info for me to get in touch with you if you win!!

*barre3 is not sponsoring this giveaway. I love this program so much I am paying for someone else to reap the benefits!

Fingers crossed {that the winner falls in love with Barre3}...

minus 65...

...pounds that is!

I can't believe I forgot to blog about this. Well, I kind of can because I slacked for much of the month of March!

Some interesting thoughts came out of losing this 65 pounds. When I first started my journey I did not believe that I could do this but I knew I had to try. And try I have. And lose I have. There's been a few things lately {namely when thinking about whole foods and no-dairy} where I've said out loud to others and to myself - "I can't do that". Well, I instantaneously switched my words up after I said the word can't...because I can. I can try to do anything!!

 

 



I kind of can't believe this was me one year ago {and then me last week}...

left: April 2012 ~ Kauai

right: April 2013 ~ Phoenix

 

But at the same time I can believe it is me! It's weird. Before I lost all this weight I sometimes would picture myself how I look now. And sometimes now, I picture myself as I used to me. Weight loss is a long, twisted, and mind-bending journey. I'm a size 8 in almost everything now. My top is a size Medium. That in and of itself is mind-bending. When I started this journey I was almost reading to buy a size 20W and size 1X shirts where too tight. It's weird to not shop at the stores I used to. It's weird to be able to walk in lululemon or Nordstroms or even Khols and find things that fit. It's going to take some more time to get used to that!

 

I buy myself rewards at the major weight loss milestones. In the past I haven't considered a -5 from a 10's weight loss {like -65} to be worthy of a reward but then I saw something I really wanted and wanted an excuse to buy it. Plus, when I hit the -60 pound mark I figured I'd plateau, but I didn't. I have kept on losing and couldn't be happier or more proud of myself! My very fashionable best friend told me this top was a good choice. She write a fashion blog...she should know! And just after I purchased this top {with the snazzy zipper in the back} she wore one on her blog ;-) See, now I'm starting fashion trends! Oh, and just to tip this adorable shirt over the edge - it's a size small. Yes, small.

 

reward top from LOFT

wearing my top in sunny Phoenix with my cousin!

 

All in all, losing 65 pounds has been amazing experience. How could it not be?? Can't wait to see where I go from here! I don't "think" I will lose a bunch more weight but I do believe I will become more and more toned. I told my best friend yesterday "Maybe next year I'll wear a 2 piece suit in public". And you know...I hope I will!!

Fingers crossed {that I'll be bikini ready next summer. Heehee}...