and the results are in...

....and here goes the rest of my life. My life after today.

It is nice to know but man, this sucks. Like, a lot. All this information I got on a voicemail from my Endo. I had called on Wednesday and played phone tag a few times and gave her permission to leave me a voicemail. It was actually nice because I could replay it again and again {and again}. The bummer part - it got cut off. I think I have all the VIP information but I'll update it if it changes!! He is supposed to talk to me tomorrow.

Here's the information. When applicable I'll say what our next step is.

Blood Sugars - Normal
This means that I am not yet in Pre-Diabetes but I'll need to be watched for it.

Insulin
I am insulin resistant. My pancreas doesn't keep up with my body. Ways to overcome this are exercise and diet. Also, there is a drug called Metformin. It works my suppressing glucose production by the liver. I will be starting that soon. I hear it can be rough but if it can help make my life better I'll have to try my hardest to push through it.
Vitamin D
I am very deficient in my Vitamin D. Maybe we need to move to Hawaii ;-) A normal level is 30 and I have 17.6. I will take 50,000 IU for 12 weeks which is a prescription. Then after that I will take D3 2,000 IU daily. I can also decide if I want to get a sunlamp...or move to Hawaii ;-)
Thyroid Level
Normal - to a point. I'm a little high on the thyroid peroxidase antibodies but nothing of clinical significance.
Estrogen Level
Normal.

Testosterone
High
17-Hydroxyprogesterone
This is what my Endocrinologist is most concerned about. My levels of this are extremely elevated and I have been referred to the OHSU Dynamic Endocrinologist Testing Unit. Sounds important, huh?! They are looking for something called Late onset congenital adrenal hyperplasia. I'm not totally sure what it is but it is basically like PCOS but um, worse, especially considering looking at if we are able to start a family... Hopefully we will rule it out instead of rule it in. If we are ruling it in there are some serious things to consider going forward to have a family that would involve some genetic testing. Major overload.

Cysts
I do have them, my ovaries are covered with them. They are not the kind you can remove and I think that is one of the most misleading things about PCOS. If you've read the "what is PCOS" section of my blog you'll learn that PCOS is actually not a good name representation of what this syndrome is. There is something called ovarian drilling but it is much worse than it sounds - if that is at all possible.
I'm feeling okay. Well, that's kind of a lie. I'm feeling overwhelmed, sad, worried, glad to know, angry, like I can't catch my breath and like I need a bottle of wine, a big one. I feel like now I'm on the roller coaster. Like, before this I was just looking at it and not wanting to go on it but now, here I am, unable to get off.

Fingers crossed.

during the storm...

...I saw a rainbow.

Today was the last day of the current round of tests to "put the pieces of the piuzzle" together. I had my ultrasound. So once I get the results from this and the glucose & blood work we'll go from there.

I've been feeling happy a lot this week. More often than not - which is a good change of pace.
And then - as I'm walking out of the ultrasound and realizing this is the "end" of this stage it is raining and sunny...and you know what rain + sun equals...

Outside the door of the hospital.

 

It was a half-arc rainbow but I couldn't get it all in one shot.

I drove across the street to give it a better look.

As I sat and looked at the rainbow tears just started coming. I couldn't stop them. I wasn't like bawling but I was certainly emotional. It wasn't for very long and I'm not even sure what it was for. Maybe for the fact that the inital testing is over. Maybe because I'm scared of what all the tests will say. There are so many options of what it could have been. Though I think, it was all of it. The unknown, the despair, the desire, the hurt, the love {I feel from my family & friends}, and the thought of what is to come.

Then I went and spent time with my AMAZING parents. Love them.

Fingers crossed.