Tuesday, October 29, 2013

the 2 year mark!!!

Today marks 2 years since my tipping point. And you know how I celebrated...

Kait, Mom, Noel, Bree, Sara, Brooke, Jason
Erica, Me, Sabrina, Alison
{missing from the picture is Brian, Alison's husband}
BARRE3, of course!!!
I had invited my friends & family to join be at the barre for a class!! I was so happy with the turn out. A few of my village battled Portland rush hour traffic to be there with me. Erica taught a ROCKING class, it was so faced paced I didn't have time to cry. Except for at the end...the tears definitely came! Erica played "Girl on Fire" and dedicated it to me and then I looked around and saw my husband, Mom, and some of the very best friends a girl could ask for.
Flowers and cards from three of my biggest cheerleaders.
Carrie - owner of barre3 who accepted me for who I was and treats me like one of her own!
Amanda - my personal trainer who believed in me LONG before I believed in myself.
Kait & the barre3 Home Office - who continue to support & surprise me with their generosity.

Cards from Carrie & Amanda
The words on the outside are powerful. The words on the inside made my cry.
Afterwards Jason, Bree, Noel and I went to grab dinner since it was 7:30 and we were starving. We headed to the Mexican restaurant that shares a parking lot with barre3. It'd been a very long time since I'd been to a Mexican restaurant. Part of me really, REALLY wanted to get a cheese quesadilla but my friends reminded me I didn't need that. Instead I got a taco salad and it was very good!
Me, Noel & Bree
These two have stood by me and lifted me up through some of the roughest patches of my life.
Jason & I
I just love him SSSOOO much!!!
I have many feelings about this milestone and the future...
It is going to be interesting to see how this "maintenance" part of my change goes. I've been the same weight for about 12 weeks now so I really do consider myself in maintenance. Sure, I want to get tighter and more toned but I don't think my number on the scale is going to move easily anymore - and that's okay! I know I will never go back to where I was!! More on how I plan to tackle the maintenance part of my journey, later!
Fingers crossed {that maintenance is as easy as losing weight was}!!!

Monday, October 28, 2013

{30 thoughts} tomorrow

Tomorrow will be 2 years, or 731 days {yes, there was a leap year}, since I hit my tipping point.

I don't quite know how to put what I am feeling into words. So I'm going to choose one that truly sums up how I feel.

{in no particular order}
Jason, Amanda, Mom, Dad, Sabrina, Sara, Carrie, Sadie, Kait, Danielle, the struggle, Angela {massage}, Diane {acupuncture}, Tony {chiro}, Brooke & Corinne {PT}, Robyn, books, Kim, barre3, Bree, Kathy, Cari, Robyn, FitBit, the scale, PCOS, the tape measure, Endo, PCOS doc, courage, strength, Dr Wei {shoulder}, this blog, other blogs, Instagram, Facebook, joy, Erica, Salina, Stacey, Eryn, Alison, Katie, Lynne, Wendy, Amanda, all my aunts - uncles - cousins - grandparents, cookbooks, my in-laws, weight watchers, Harper, all the barre3 home office team members, Chris L, coworkers, myself, my fear, New Seasons, my passion, my body, my mind, new opportunities {QVC, Just Jenny, b3 convention}, those who doubted me, those who encouraged me.
I'm sure I'll be editing and adding to this list for a day or more!
Fingers crossed {the next 2 years are as exciting as the last 2}!!!

Sunday, October 27, 2013

{30 thoughts} busy being busy!

I totally fell off my 30 thoughts wagon last week. I thought about writing a few times but we were just SO dang busy! The downfall of being so busy means eating out. Today I'll divulge where I was and what I ate last week. I will be back-posting tips & thoughts so don't you worry! There is still more to come!

Monday we got some photo's taken! Just because we don't have cute kids doesn't mean we can't get our pictures taken. Right?? After taking pictures it was 6:30 and we were 30 minutes away from home and hungry! We went to Thai Orchid in downtown Vancouver and it was delish! I had the yellow curry with brown rice. Next time I might get just a chicken & veggie dish instead of the curry.

Tuesday we went to Grand Central Bowl with Jason's work. A company that works with him has a bowling night in Portland every year! Even though I was on restriction with my shoulder I still bowled a round!! We also exchanged names & numbers with some people our age in his industry so we are looking forward to make those connections! Since it was a business dinner it was catered and had free wine. I'll be honest here - I had two glasses of wine and three pieces of pizza. And you know what...I felt like crap ALL night! I also had a huge salad so it wasn't all carbs! Thankfully there were no desserts there otherwise I'm sure I would have eaten them!

gimp bowling

Wednesday I went to a book signing at Annie Bloom's Bookstore in Portland! We listen to and met Kelly from The Spunky Coconut! It was so fun to meet her and get our new cookbooks signed by her. Sabrina and I ate out a a fabulous restaurant called Marco's. I can't wait to take Jason there someday! I had a special that was chicken, potatoes, and veggies. It was delish and very worth it. I was full but not stuffed.

Sabrina, Kelly, and I

borrowed from Kelly's IG. That's me at the bottom right!
Thursday was BUNCO. Bunco is always full of bad food. Well, not always. Last month myself and another barre3 babe brought the food and it was all healthy! This month there was pulled chicken with Hawaiian sweet rolls, CANDY, Ritz crackers filled with PB or Nutella dipped in white chocolate, hummus and veggies/chips. And wine. This was really the first time in 1.5 years our Bunco group broke out the wine. I had one small glass and drank it through a straw. I definitely ate too much but I did have a Pita Pit salad before so...that must count for something?!?!
This weekend we actually had really good food choices. We'd both eaten out SO much during the week that it didn't even cross our minds to eat out!
I'm thankful I didn't go {too} overboard in eating and that I have a fun, busy life!
Fingers crossed {that I continue to make good choices}.

Saturday, October 26, 2013

{30 thought} first focus group!

Today I went to my first focus group! I was contacted by half of the bloggers from Cardigans and Couture, Regan who has a friend who was running the group. Her email went something like this...

I am passing along the word for a friend who is looking for women to participate in a focus group or "at home ethnography" related to bras. Clearly I don't fall into the D-DD category…not sure that you do either, but I know you have better cleavage than I do!

I love that she felt comfy enough to contact me! It was quite the experience. I sat around a table with other women and talked about boobs & bras. Jason wanted to know why he wasn't invited ;-)

I can't disclose what we looked at or what we talked about but it was very nice to talk to other ladies who have the same issues as me!

I kind of can't believe the difference in my chest in these pics! CRAZY!!!

Fingers crossed {for I don't know what. It sounds weird to cross my fingers about my chest}

Friday, October 25, 2013

{30 thoughts} NSV

I don't quite know where I first heard the term Non Scale Victory?! I think it was actually on Instagram!

A non scale victory is just that...something fabulous when you aren't standing on the scale!

Here's a few of my favorites from the past 2 years!

A dress being too big.
2 years ago size 18W. Now size 8.

Wrap around apron.
Backpack I hadn't worn in a year!

Fitting in to old pants {about 1 year ago}
Being celebrated.

Introducing those you love most to your favorite place.

New sizes!!

Trying new activities.

Fingers crossed {that there are many, many more NSV in my future}!!!

Thursday, October 24, 2013

{30 thoughts} when will the celebrating stop?

Or should the celebrating stop?

As my two year tipping point anniversary approaches next week I've been thinking about this a lot. I like rewards, attention, and all these changes I've made!

I like to celebrate pounds lost, time spent, and results gained. I don't really know how many more "weight" celebrations I will get. I hope to someday get to -80 pounds but I don't know. The lowest I've gotten is to -79 pounds so it seems reachable! But after that I don't think my body is meant to lose too much more! I suppose I will continue to lose inches, too.

It seems like from here on out the milestones will be able time passing, joints working correctly, and finding new ways to get involved in what I truly love. It will be about lab results, tipping point & barre3 anniversaries, and new endeavors. And that's okay. It is time to focus on maintaining this lifestyle, inspiring others, and likely something that I don't know is a possibility!

Fingers crossed {there is a lot more to celebrate in the future}!!!

Wednesday, October 23, 2013

{30 thoughts} sure, I'm just skinny I can cheat*

*This is not what I think of myself. Read on.

Most people are offended by cuss words but I am most certainly not one of them. There are words that to bug me and I know I am guilty of using them in the past but at the present point in my life...they just aren't my favorite.

If you look up the definition of SKINNY it says "very thin or too thin." Sure, there are people that are skinny but I am not one of them. I consider myself fit (wow, that's weird to say). Just last week someone said "look at you miss skinny minny" and I tried not to cringe. I nicely said "Ohhh, I don't consider myself skinny, I consider myself fit" and left it at that. I know they meant it is a compliment so I try to take it as one. We have been conditioned that skinny is the "right" way to be. I might be okay with the worth thin but even that doesn't apply to me. I have curves and I LOVE them...I don't want to be labeled skinny or thin - I want to be labeled FIT :)

This is one of the things I am not sure I ever said to myself. Every pound I lost I was happy. I might have, maybe I blocked it out. I digress. When people say they "just lost" or "only lost" X amount of pounds in X amounts of weeks I hope someday they come to realize what a feat that truly was! There is nothing wrong with losing 1 pound a week. In fact, it's better to do it that way. I lost my first 60 pounds in 60 weeks and was staggered. Now, here I am at week 104 and I have lost 79 pounds. Yes, the gap has gotten bigger but I am still happy!!

I get that everyone wants to lose weight, fast. But you know what...

Another word I dislike is CHEAT. As a general rule I think using the word cheating is a cop out. When people cheat {on eating, each other or a test} it is conscious choice you are making. It wasn't an accident. When I eat something that isn't "clean" or "healthy" I know what I am doing. Now, with that being said I know when I was eating unhealthy {and sometimes now} I would unconsciously over eat or binge on a food {can you say Doritos}!!! I consider the "cheat foods or meals" I have to be a part of life. Sometimes I choose to eat pizza, doughnuts, Skittles, pasta, bread, cheese, etc., though often time I don't!
Fingers crossed {I can maintain all of this hard work I've done}

Tuesday, October 22, 2013

{30 thoughts} things people say...

People say some ODD things. I know I am guilty of this too but long ago I wanted to jot some of these down. There are things people have seriously said to me.

{When we were trying to get pregnant}

My husband could just look at my and I could get pregnant.

I wish I'd have had trouble getting pregnant then I wouldn't have had three little kids at the same time.

Just relax.

It'll happen if you really want it.

I could see you guys not ever having kids.

{When I was losing weight}
It's just a diet. You'll be off of it by next month.
Don't get too skinny like ______. She doesn't look healthy now.
What diet pill are you taking?
Do you think you're really going to be able to do this?
Why are you doing this to yourself?

Some of these questions are valid, some are insane, and some are down right insulting! I good portion of these are from 2 people. But you know what...the best part of all of it - it doesn't matter! I mean, it bugs me but it doesn't affect what I am doing. I am letting all the positive praise, comments, and inquiries fill me up with joy!!!

Rise above the negative.

Fingers crossed {that I haven't accidentally said something like this to someone}!

Monday, October 21, 2013

{30 thoughts} PCOS & dairy

Over a year ago my PCOS specialist told me to eliminate dairy. Yeah right...I thought. I think I might have even said it. Then, one month last fall, I tried it. And I didn't get a zit all month. I HAD to have been a coincidence I thought. So I started consuming dairy again and BAM! zits galore! What's even crazier is that depending on what type of dairy I eat as to where my acne pops up. Milk = head/hair. Cheese = chin/cheeks. I don't eat yogurt so I don't really know about that one!

Now, I still do have cheese, just now it is only a few times a week and my body kind of seems to be able to process is it without going into overdrive! I am not a doctor so I don't quite understand how this all works but I have read some good articles on it...


Will Eliminating Dairy Improve My PCOS Skin Concerns?

It has been proven in clinical studies that dairy contributes to PCOS acne. Put your World perspective lenses back on and look at how acne, a common PCOS symptom, affects the rest of the world. You will find that in less modern and wealthy countries with diets either low or dairy free, acne is non existent.
Dairy consumption spikes male sex hormones, androgens and testosterone, which are responsible for the hormonal production of acne. These anabolic hormones in addition to IGF-1 (remember that ugly hormone from earlier?) literally stimulate your skin to produce skin blemishes. In studies (6) it has been proven that dairy is associated with acne because of the presence of hormones.
BOTTOM LINE: Dairy is a major factor in eliminating PCOS skin issues. Ridding dairy from your diet will reduce the anabolic male sex hormones that are responsible for the hormonal production of acne. 

I am definitely a bit saddened by this outcome but I am willing to accept it most of the time because it just makes life easier! When I do eat cheese you can be certain that it is going to be the best!! I don't order it on salads and I use Feta sparingly on my salads. Barre3 nutrition director Jennifer Currtis said it best when she said "Use it like a spice". I will forever remember that!

I've seen others, specifically my friend Chelsea, in the PCOS community had success with eliminating or cutting back on dairy so it definitely works for some of us Cysters!! Looking back I ate macaroni & cheese at least two times per week...no wonder I always had acne!

I found THIS website that really explains it in easy to understand terms why cheese is so addictive and so not good for some people.

I truly hope this helps some of you out there who might have PCOS and be struggling with acne!

Fingers crossed {I don't go cheese crazy once we open the Cougar Gold}...

Sunday, October 20, 2013

{30 thoughts} it takes time {food prep edition}...

Being healthy takes time, and lots of it!

I spend almost every Sunday going to barre3, going grocery shopping, and then coming home and spending the afternoon in the kitchen! Today I snuck in a facial too for a reward for keeping this lifestyle up for 2 years but that's another story for another day!

On Friday or Saturday I usually plan my meals a day or two before by paroosing Pinterest, looking at the barre3 blog, or going through some of my cookbooks.

messy kitchen's are okay when whole food is being prepped!
Sometimes I go shopping before class and when I do I make sure to being along my cooler! It keeps everything super cold until I've returned home. Jason got this as a gift for being in his friend Adam's wedding and I can say, without a doubt, that this is the MOST re-used bridesmaid/groomsman gift we've ever received!

Once I have my recipes all printed I take care to notice similarities in the recipes. For instance, today all my recipes called for onions so I chopped 3 onions at once and then divided them up! I cooked two of the meals today and packaged up the other 1/3 for use later in the week!

Here is my fridge this week {and really, what it looks like most weeks}. I try to keep it very organized but I have a roommate {aka my hubby}!

full and happy fridge!
Top left: condiment type things. sour cream, Yumm sauce, nut butters, veg broth.
Top right: eggs, salad fixings, chopped veggies
Middle left: WAY too much cheese {yet to be delivered to the people}, salad containers where I prep 4 salad topping combinations for the week.
Middle right: Chopped snack veggies, salad, leftovers.
Left middle drawer: cheese and random things {currently pepperoni and ginger reside there}
Right bottom: Veggies that won't fit in the veggie drawer.
Left bottom drawer: Raw meant only. Ever.
Right bottom drawer: Veggies
While it does take a considerable amount of time every weekend to do this it is so worth it for us. If I am not prepared then by the time I get home from work, working out, and whatever else I am exhausted and I don't want to spend an hour cooking dinner! Today I made a cauliflower soup, hard boiled eggs, zucchini bread, 4 salad containers, snack veggies, and other things I feel that I am forgetting ;-)
Fingers crossed {that someday my husband joins me in the food prep fun}!!!
PS. Random but....
my apron is a little big!

Saturday, October 19, 2013

{30 thoughts} the brain game {clothes version}...

There are a lot of aspects of losing this much weight that are a major brain game! The one that gets me every.single.day is looking in my mirror and looking at my clothes.

When I was obese everything was tight. The only way around weight clothes that weren't tight would have been to wear a MuuMuu and those aren't too fashionable when you're in your 20's...or really...ever! My brain got so used to seeing tight clothes on my body that now that is all it knows!

Everything is tight when you're obese.
Now that I am not obese, and am technically considered in the "normal BMI range", my brain still wants to see my body in tight clothes. But I don't want to show too much off but I do want show off what I have worked for. I don't want to have my clothes make me look bigger but I don't want my stomach to be punching out of my shirt. I want to be fashionable and comfortable.

my official barre3 photo ;-)
as Sadie said "Look at that waist"!

after my live TV debut. No Spanx under these Spandex pants ;-)
It's a delicate balance. It's a mind game.

Fingers crossed {I'm doing this all right}.

Friday, October 18, 2013

{30 thoughts} this isn't a diet...

Despite what some people told me when I first started my change, this is NOT a diet. Sure, in the past I'd failed at changing my lifestyle for various reasons. I wasn't ready, I didn't know how, I didn't want to. This time was different. I had the drive, the lab results, and the support that I needed.

When I first started eating healthy {and many, many times now-a-days} it is hard to turn down the treats, the sweets, and the old staples in my diet. I do it sometimes and I don't do it at other times. Sometimes I use my "it has to be the best of that item" rule and sometimes I don't! It's as simple and as complicated as that.

This quote speaks to me. I didn't do this in 5 months, I did it in 2+ years!!

2 years ago today!!!
Left 2011
Middle 2012
Right 2013

It's a little big ;-)
You know the reason I know this isn't a diet. Just last tonight we were eating pizza {yes, it is not barre3 fall challenge approved but alas} and Jason said "I think the salad tastes better than the pizza". This week I walked down the mac & cheese isle at the grocery store and my mouth didn't salivate. When we go to restaurants we always order salads now. Going gluten free {yes, the pizza was not gluten free} isn't as daunting as I thought it was even a month ago.
I won't go back. I can't go back.

Fingers crossed {that this lifestyle change gets easier & easier}!!

Thursday, October 17, 2013

{30 thoughts} will history repeat itself?

My thoughts are overrun by my shoulder. It hurts. I can't stop thinking about it. I also can't talk a lot on the internet about it since it happened at work. But I am going through every scenario in my head and a lot of them are negative. Last year I was going through the motions of PT. I did my exercises but it wasn't getting better. I tried elcrostym, patches, and whatever else they told me...and it ended in surgery.

taping 2012
taping 2013
patch 2012

11 month later...patched up again.
Fingers crossed {that history isn't repeating itself}...
ps. I'm scared. Really scared.